Unite Russia forced to remove bear from logo due to ‘clear homosexual connotations’

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In a land mark decision in the Russian Supreme Court, Vladimir Putin’s party Unite Russia lost its long running legal battle against its own anti-gay propaganda laws.

The Supreme court judge ruled that ‘bears’, a long standing symbol of the Russian nation, had now firmly been appropriated by gay subculture as a term denoting a large, hairy, homosexual gentleman. The Supreme Court’s ruling now means that continued use of the ‘bear image’ by Unite Russia and other nationalist organizations could result in criminal prosecutions.

The bear symbol is now legally the trademark of the hyper-masculine subculture of the gay community under Russian law. The decision marks then end of a protracted legal battle than began shortly after the homophobic amendment to the federal law “On Protecting Children from Information Harmful to Their Health and Development” passed through the state Duma.

In his closing remarks, the Supreme Court Judge concluded that the bear as a gay symbol is not limited to contemporary slang. “Having looked at bears throughout popular culture, from Yogi and Boo-Boo, Winnie and Piglet or Buloo and Mogli, what emerges is a continued portrayal of bears in latent, closeted gay relationships.

‘Don’t even get started on Sooty and Sweep’ he added. ‘They form part of an endless list of bears in ersatz gay relationships, which have corrupted an entire generation of children with concepts on non-traditional sexual behaviour. I have no choice but to conclude that the bear is symbolic of everything antithetical to Russia and its values.

During the course of the trial Vladimir Putin was repeatedly found in contempt of court after repeatedly failing to obey the Judge’s orders to put his shirt back on.