Students have just three days to not vote in SU Council elections

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The many things students will be doing other than voting.

The many things students will be doing other than voting.

As polling for the 2014 Students’ Union Council election begins, students have just three days to express total apathy towards SU politics by not voting.

Experts are predicting another exceptionally high non-turnout following the 92 per cent of students who couldn’t care enough to press a button on a computer last year.

Candidates are expected to encourage yet another successful year of political apathy by focusing their campaigns on major global issues the SU has virtually no impact on and preaching the need for a revolution at the end of every sentence.

In a bid to ensure non-turnout remains as high as previous years, a referendum accompanying the election will focus on a bottled water ban no one understands and changes to SU officers which no one knows anything about.

Postgraduate Politics student Mark Thompson, a committed non-voter for the past three years, said it’s “encouraging to see such lack of interest continue year on year.”

“Occasionally students will start to genuinely care about what happens in the wider world and begin to think how they can solve world hunger, overthrow oppression and force multinational corporations to clean up their act.

“But then reality kicks in and we realise we’d much rather just sit around watching Netflix.”

SU representatives became concerned last year when one candidate produced a manifesto based on moderate, small-scale promises that focused entirely on matters students experience first-hand.

The student’s candidacy was later withdrawn on suspicion of being a hoax.